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I managed the impossible! I punched Kimaris in the nose! Granted I feel bad in spite of myself, but I’m reveling in the fact that I had the strength enough to inflict such a strike! Alas, I shouldn’t, but there really is something to favor in triumph.
Kimaris had his back to me when I approached. He wore a richly made tunic about his form. It was gaudy, yet more becoming of him over his nakedness. I took a deep breath and dived in.
“Hey,” I called out. Kimaris shifted his weight to look at me. He lifted his eyebrows, silently asking what I wanted. An exasperated sigh escaped my lips. “Look Kimaris, you and I clearly got off on the wrong foot. Most certainly I'm a thorn in your side as you are in mine,” I told him. My companion nodded, seeming impatient. I began to feel unsure of what I was doing and so rushed on by proposing a truce.
“How do you expect this ‘truce’ to work?” Kimaris questioned. And so I listed off the two options:
- He could leave me be- meaning no touching, talking, or referring to me in front of or behind my back.
He didn’t look to like the first as I explained it. Or,
- He teaches me how to defend myself.
Kimaris’s head snapped up to look at me. I’m sure he was gauging my seriousness to which I added, “Think about it. You’ll get to enjoy knocking me around some more and I hopefully will get a few punches in myself.”
The latter felt lame and I thought Kimaris would have jumped at the opportunity, but instead he asked, “Why?”
So I confessed to him, “Because I need to be able to protect myself. I’m tired of being so pathetic and fighting against you certainly isn’t making it any better.” The sting my pride took was manageable. I don’t like that I agreed with Kimaris about my uselessness. I had then braced myself for the gloating, but instead, my companion got to his feet and said, “Hit me.”
“Now?” I questioned. He confirmed, instructing me again to hit him, tapping his nose as the target. I almost refused, but remembered I needed to be serious. The boy was giving me a chance. With fists clenched and positioned in front of me, I let my right hand jab out. It hit him squarely on the cheek, the impact surprising me some.
“Sorry,” I automatically said.
“Is that really all you got?” Kimaris asked. It shocked me to no end that my strike wasn't hard enough, so I doubted his words at first. He insisted that I strike harder, adding, “I’ve done plenty to make you angry, so hit me!”
“Just because you’ve made me angry doesn’t mean that I should make it physical,” I minded him. The boy then pushed my shoulder with the tips of his fingers. I rubbed the spot, which turned to an itch on the backside of my shoulder. Kimaris pushed me again to which I pushed back asking him what his problem was.
“Hit me!” he demanded. It then clicked. We were sparring! So quickly I brought my fist up and sent another punch to his cheek. Like the first, it did little to appease my companion. After each punch he’d shout, “Harder!” After the fifth time repeating his request, I let out a frustrated cry of my own and hit his nose. I had only meant to hit him hard enough to shut him up, and not only did I manage that, but a crack rippled under my fist.
Immediately I apologized as the blood began to trickle down his face. I went to heal him, but Kimaris refused me. Instead he smiled his coy grin I was becoming all too familiar with and said, “I knew you had it in you.”
That statement alone is enough to baffle me. It was that softness again that seemed contrary to my companion’s nature. But it didn’t stop at that line. Kimaris then helped me grasp my potential:
“Why not put that kind of strength forward when you’re fighting- or rather when we were fighting those skeletons the last few days?”
“Because I’m not a fighter.”
“You should be. You can’t expect to never fend for yourself.”
“I understand that, hence why I want to learn how to defend myself.”
“Is that all you’ll use it for?”
“Of course. I’m not going to go around and pick fights just because I can.”
“But understand that even in defending you may have to choose to take a life.”
“I will not!” I was truly surprised by such a bold statement. Kimaris, however, was quite serious.
“What about those who murdered your father? Wouldn’t you like to see them killed?”
“It matters not what I want. If we find them, we’ll take them to the Paladins and use the evidence to convict them.”
“Alright. But what if there is no evidence- or worse yet, they get off scot free anyways. Wouldn’t you want to bring your justice upon them?”
It really bothered me that he was trying to get me to condone murder, and so I tried to remind him of our mortality by firmly saying, “I have no right to decide who dies! That responsibility lies with the Gods!”
The moment I said ‘Gods,’ my voice faltered as a wave of understanding washed over me. It’s hard to describe, but one moment I was very much in denial that I was a Primordial, but suddenly, I am. I always have been, I just lack the memories.
Kimaris noticed my second epiphany and leaned in close to me, saying, “Now you get it? We’re greater than the Gods!”
I pursed my lips. In that moment we were very much not greater than the Gods. In time, we will be, but in that moment I couldn’t agree. Let alone, at the same time, Bordel had returned, expressing his disapproval to such a notion.
Fern and Oda arrived shortly thereafter as I cleaned Kimaris up. We enjoyed a meal of venison and I entertained a moment with my lyre. While sitting around the fire I learned that Oda was from these parts, though it’s been decades since he’s returned. I envied him that he was able to enjoy such comfort of being home. Dread is what laces my veins.
I say, this whole day has been one for the eternities. The dynamics of our party, especially between me and Kimaris, has been tried relentlessly. How is it possible that the ire I felt toward the boy has suddenly been resolved, or at least for the night? It just doesn’t seem possible.
I’m also concerned about what ill opinion I might have gained with Bordel. I suppose much can’t be helped with that other than to move forward.
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