LANA
“Lana, do you know what love is?”
“Yeah,” Lana lied, not bothering to look at Dr. Tomlund. It wasn’t that she was purposefully being dishonest, instead it was her poor upbringing that skewed her understanding of love. In time Lana learned how to recite the textbook answers to appease Dr. Tomlund, but never had she felt it.
That is until now.
Lana sat next to her unconscious friend. His face had become more recognizable, the swelling having gone away as the week passed by.
Please wake up Rin! Lana pleaded silently. The Halfling remained still. Once she had heard him mutter something but it was too incoherent. The only hope she had for him surviving was the steady rise and fall of his chest.
A week ago she was scared that Sylis could have spoken truth about the Halfling, that Rin might have left town after she had promised herself to the Wizard. Part of her almost wished Sylis had been right. It would have been easier to have dealt with Rin’s abandonment over the guilt she was now plagued with.
Lana had gone to check on him, hoping Rin had returned from his job, but found his home emptied. She left a note for her friend before returning to Sylis and informing him that he wasn’t there.
“Lana... do you think Rin might have left town?” Sy asked as they walked to the tattoo parlor.
“Of course not!” she retorted, “He’s doing a job. For all I know he could be gone a few days. It was wishful thinking he’d be done by now.”
Sylis however pushed the topic. He explained how on the ship, when he had kissed her for the first time, that Rin had seen the exchange. “He gave a look that a man would give another when they’ve been defeated. I think he might have loved you.”
“We’re just friends Sylis!” her words came firmly, “He said he was happy for us. He wouldn’t just leave me without saying good bye!”
At the time, Lana’s face burned as anger bubbled to the surface. If he had left, that would have been crippling. He was her best friend and the only one who didn't treat her with the hopes to bed her. For all she knew, Rin wasn't interested in women. Lana had been naked in front of him on more than one occasion and never had he reacted or treated her differently. But it didn’t help that Sylis kept trying to convince her of the Halfling's likely disappearance.
“Stop it!” she had yelled at him, “He’s not gone! You’re acting jealous ya know!”
“What have I to be jealous of? I have my forever,” Sylis said warmly, pulling her in. Lana gave a fake smile. She couldn't believe Rin loving her. She still had a hard time believing that Sylis loved her. Sure he said it to her often enough, but maybe it was just the sex...
But something woke within Lana a week ago. After being taken by Barut, she had momentarily forgotten near everything she knew. She had found herself in a cold prison, endured his rape, and escaped with friends who she thought were strangers. Lana had watched Rin get beaten and hated that of all people she’d forget, he was one of them.
The Warforge, Shard, agreed to help carry Rin for Lana. Sylis found Lana’s pack, boots, and daggers. He passed them to her and soon she had a long shirt retrieved and thrown over her.
As they left warehouse, Lana thanked the men for saving her and the Halfling. Sylis ever so often would try and wrap an arm around her. Not remembering him, the contact was stifling and sent the sensation of spiders crawling over her skin.
“Could you please not touch me?” she had demanded. Sylis, however, couldn’t believe his ears.
“Not touch you? Are you joking around with me? Lana, it’s me! Sylis!” The Wizard noted the scared look on Lana’s face and continued with a softer tone, “I'm your life, your forever.” He tried to take her hand in his.
"Why would I joke? What do you mean ‘your forever’!?" Lana spat back, jerking her hand away. “I’ve only just met you! Don’t think you can do what you like just because you saved me!” Her arms once more wrapped around herself protectively.
Sylis looked pained. After a few more minutes of quiet walking, he spoke of their shared past. He reminded her of the Bringers of Hope Guild, of how they fought side by side, of their time on the cruise, and of the red string’s meaning.
As he talked, Lana shaking her head at his attempts to convince her, it was like something melted away inside her mind. She looked down at the red string and the memories suddenly unraveled. The guild came into clear view. She started to sleep there after they failed to kill Barut at the Magic Flute. Then the graveyard where she saw the ghost of her mother, Sylis had wrapped her tightly in his arms that night as the memory haunted her. Then the cruise and the intimacy they shared there.
Lana had stopped walking. She slowly looked to Sylis and felt such a joy to see him again. He had come for her! He had saved her! What possessed her to have forgotten him?
She wrapped her arms about him tightly, enjoying his embrace for a brief moment. Sylis was a haven to the hell Barut put her through. Lana then turned to thank Shard as well, but spotted Rin unconscious on his shoulder. Something gripped at Lana’s heart as she recalled what she heard Barut say to him.
She has done this to you! She has brought you here!
It was her fault. If Rin had never helped Lana, if they never had met, he never would have been involved. The guilt was worse than when her mother’s ghost accused her for murder...
But then Rin’s voice replaced Barut’s. Rin knows Lana’s a good woman! And that was even worse. What did the Halfling see in her that would make him say that? She had brought him nothing but trouble and used him for help. His friendship was more of a convenience.
Yet Lana found herself holding Rin’s hand as she sat next to him. All week she had watched over him, putting his recovery above all else. The morning sun illuminated his pale skin. Though he looked far better than when she had first brought him to Faela, his body still was covered in gauze and poultices. The wounds were healing slowly and every time she saw them it was a reminder of how terrible she was.
Women like you deserve to be punished! Barut’s voice taunted.
Large tears poured down her cheeks. She quickly wiped them away. Sylis wasn’t there to catch them and she was happy about that. She didn’t want his distraction, not while Rin remained hurt. Let alone she still felt betrayed that he would accuse Rin for being the reason Lana was abducted.
“Because I don’t trust him!” Sylis retorted when Lana asked why he had denied knowing the Halfling. “Think about it. He’s always in the wrong place at the wrong time. For all we know he could have been why you were taken in the first place!”
“How could you think that! Rin would never sell any of us out! He’s saved my life AND your life at least once!” Lana shouted. On top of everything that had happened to her over the past few hours, accusing Rin of such betrayal ignited a rage Lana didn't know she had. “Just leave me alone!" she continued to shout, "I’m going to make sure Rin get’s well if it’s the last thing I do! And I don’t need your help!”
Sylis cursed back at her, exaggerating his joy for her being back.
And so it was, a week ago, Lana entered the church next to Rin’s home dressed in just a shirt, writhing in anger and self loathing, with Shard and her dying friend.
Please Rin come back to me!
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